Takeaways From HBO 'Hard Knocks'
Season 14 Series Finale
This may not be politically correct, but fuck it. In the words of Chris Brown, "it's never the right time to say goodbye." Though I'm a Cowboys fan, the Raiders feel like family now. Five episodes of Hard Knocks and I want to thank you, good brothers and sisters, of the Black Hole for taking me in graciously. Hail to Gruden, AB, Mayock (LOL) and Raiders Nation. Al Davis' dream lives on.
Working on Jon Gruden's staff has to be a treat. He's wise. He loves the fuck out of football. And he's there to help the next guy pursuit his dream of becoming an NFL head coach. There's not a hating bone in ole' Jonny's body The Gruden tree is astounding, and I'd give my left nut to hear him jam out to Metallica at 4 am. That's my guy.
I remember watching how T.O. took care of his body on his reality T.V. show. Yes, I watched The T.O. Shit and paid attention to things other than the cringeworthy moments. A.B.'s work ethic rivals the great's -- T.O. , Jerry Rice, Larry Fitzgerald. There's a reason Antonio's a first-ballot Hall of Famer. He eats, sleeps, and breathes being great. Not going to lie, I cried during the end when he was working out in the backyard. If you want to be great, it's a 24/7/365-day job. There are no shortcuts. It is what it is.
EVERYBODY KNOWS DANNY WOODHEAD COMES FROM CHADRON STATE. Honestly, you only know that if you're one of those weirdos like me who looks up every player in the league's university and commits it to memory. Ya'll remember the Pop-Warner Youtube-sensation Cody Paul? He's a pipsqueak who went to Chadron State too LOL.
Trent Brown wasn't trying to hear none of that shit Brandon Marshall was talking. His facial expression said it all. "Breh, I hear you, but I don't hear you. Why are you emptying your guts to me when there's perfectly fresh agua staring us in the face?" Trent Brown not trying to vouch for you, hombre.
Hard Knocks gives you an in-depth look at the insanity involved in knocking each other's skulls around for money. Everyone talks about how they would love to be in these players' shoes, making money while playing a "child's" game. It's not that simple. These guys have mouths to feed, and they're living day-by-day in terms of job security. You never know when it's your time. The career you've been working toward for years can end at any moment. In this cutthroat business, only so many last. That's why it's called Not For Long.
Like 95 percent of NFL fans who've witnessed Nathan Peterman attempt a pass, I've spent his entire career shitting on his performance. It could've been the Pinot Grigio, or maybe I've grown up over the last 24 hours, but I've grown newfound respect for Peterman. He can thank the touching moments with his family for that. They've had to endure hell ever since he's stepped inside the league's lines. I really couldn't imagine people going after me or my child, in the same manner, he's been attacked by arbitrary couch potatoes. I owe you an apology, Nate.
The production team at HBO deserves its Emmy. The crafting of the Keelan Doss story took nothing short of brilliance. Gruden said afterward that Doss was a camp body. These bastards at Hard Knocks tricked us into believing he'd be bound for the 53. Now the Alameda kid won't make the Raiders, but the dude can play. Jacksonville may be the spot that brings out the best in Keelan Doss, but if not, he'll make it in this league. I still can't believe they got us like that — a manufactured man crush.
We found real family in the show. My little brother King thought he made it through without being caught on camera, but the hidden joints in the elevator thought otherwise. The grim reaper made his appearance.
I'm not sure which team HBO picks for next season, but I want our visitors to email me who they think it might be at email@example.com. I've got the Redskins, right now — Holla at me.